Day 168 - Tuesday 19th May 2009

Okay, well I guess I'm finally here today after a couple of weeks, to pretty much confess that it seriously looks like I've become addicted to cooked food again. Don't get me wrong it's certainly not the typical SAD - I'm still a strict vegan (no grains, dairy, meat etc...) but I've resorted to cooking my vegetables, particularly now that it is getting colder here and have started to consume more nuts, avocados and dates for some reason. As a result this is killing my digestive system and I'm feeling bloated, have indigestion and stomach pains, yet continue to eat cooked.
Why???
I know the reason why, yet it certainly doesn't help me or solve the problem. You see the last month or so my fruit intake has declined which has meant I crave cooked food and overt fats (nuts, avocado's) more. I know I have to increase my fruit intake again in order to take the cooked cravings away, but what do you do if you quite simply don't want the fruit?
There are a few fruits that I use to really like eating that now turn my stomach and as the days go by I'm finding that I'm wanting and eating less and less fruit. I can't actually believe I'm saying that, because I love fruit, but it's true.
As well as the problems I'm experiencing with indigestion, I've also found that my arthritis pain has increased again, particularly in the morning when it is quite bad and that if it wasn't for exercising I don't think I would get through the day. I still haven't resorted to taking medication again, although some days I could easily do so because of the pain.
Whether my pain has returned because of the cooked food, the salt I put on the cooked food, the increase in overt fats, or even the weather turning colder, I am yet to discover.
At the end of each day, when I go to bed feeling quite frankly wrecked, I tell myself that tomorrow will be different, however I have been telling myself this now for weeks and still nothing has changed.
I feel like I have totally failed, when this is something that I so wanted. I know how raw and then 811LFRV (80/10/10 Low Fat Raw Vegan) made me feel, yet I still allowed myself to get to this point.
The mind is a powerful thing and willpower is something I generally have a lot of...........where has it gone now that I need it so much?

Day 87 - Friday 27th February 2009

I start off today by saying that I am now officially 80 10 10rv (3 days now) and have also read Dr Graham's book 'The 80 10 10 Diet'.

I was lucky enough to have the book on loan from a lovely lady on one of the Raw Food forums I frequent and have thoroughly enjoyed the read.

Not only was the book an eye opener in many areas, but it also taught me a lot about nature and the human body. I believe now after reading it that I understand the body more and how it works.

I don't believe that 80 10 10 is the type of book that you read and then forget about it, quite the contrary actually. I feel that if you change your diet to raw in particular 80 10 10rv (raw vegan) you are more likely to care about your body and what you put into it. I want to be in touch with my body more and want to give it the best chance at increased health & wellbeing.

Since discovering raw, particularly low fat raw, I feel that an awful lot of the raw communtity are still harming their bodies by continuing to eat high fat/gourmet raw. I mean don't get me wrong, this is how I started out; raw breads, biscuits, chips & snacks and it helped tremendously with the transition from SAD to raw. I pretty quickly though became aware of what my body wanted and what tasted better and it wasn't long before I stopped eating those foods.

Gourmet raw I found was very rich, filling, heavy in the stomach and didn't digest well. It was not a hard decision to make to stop consuming these foods, even when I did, I still left myself open to go back that way if I wanted, but to date I haven't and don't want to.

I enjoy eating fresh fruit & vegetables more than I ever thought I would. I mean I always liked fruit, but generally only as a snack and certainly not as a meal. If I had a sweet craving, like anyone following SAD, it would be a chocolate or a piece of cake that I would grab to satisfy those cravings. Now, except perhaps for one particular time of the month, (when I will have a few dates to satisfy that craving) I do not suffer them. Cravings are now pretty much non-existant.

I know since becoming raw, more so now in the last month, I have changed as a person, though, in a good way. I have become more in tune with me, don't seem to stress as much, am in control more of my life. I care more about what I put into my mouth and use on my body. I have changed my soap, shampoo/conditioner, facial products & toothpaste to 100% organic and am now slowly working on replacing the other chemical laden products that are used daily, in the household.

If we want to live life to the fullest, we need to do something to make the changes necessary to live a happy, healthy and fruitful life.

If I can make a difference within this little space of the world I occupy, then I can feel proud I've done my bit. Life is far too short to sit back and watch, hoping someone else will fix things or that things will get better. I did this for far too long and accomplished nothing.

It may have taken me my entire life to work it out, but now that I have, I can do something to make the necessary changes to live the rest of my life healthy in the best possible way.